Stages of Drunkenness

This pretty much sums it up, if you say it does not you are only lying to yourself! lol. I have left the last stage out as its a different experience for everyone, would love to know what you think, if you relate and what your final experience for the night would be? And ALWAYS remember to drink responsibly 

Stage 1 – SMARTY PANTS
This is when you become an expert in EVERY field and have been everywhere and done everything twice. The game of one-upmanship is very demanding at this stage of drinking, as you are always right and everyone else in the conversation is clearly wrong.

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Stage 2 – GOOD LOOKING (also known as the Zoolander stage)
This is when your confidence soars to new heights and you feel like the most attractive person in the world. You approach anyone with ease and keep in mind, at this stage you already know everything and have been everywhere and done everything, so the conversation will flow. THIS is the stage you feel everyone wants you and you will have to make a hard choice by the end of the night.

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Stage 3 – THE DRINKS ARE ON ME
This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. This stage usually results in you forgetting the electricity, phone and rent. You offer to buy everyone drinks telling them to put their wallets away because CLEARLY you are hot right now and everyone wants and needs you. The bills can wait.

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Stage 4 – UNTOUCHABLE
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone feeling confident you can take them on with your Thor like strength (and looks) nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge to a battle of wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle because you are SMART, you are RICH and hell, you’re BETTER LOOKING than they are anyway!

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Stage 5 – INVISIBLE
This is the final stage of drunkenness. At this point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You think you are walking in a perfectly straight line. You now have found your inner Beyonce and can be found twerking and singing at the top of your lungs on the dance floor. THIS is the stage when you friends need to drag you home, put you to bed and tell you everything’s alright in the morning!

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So which stages are you? Do you have your own set of rules? we would love to hear! and ALWAYS Drink Responsibly